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Letters to the editor of the New Haven Register, New Haven, Connecticut, http://nhregister.com. Email to letters@nhregister.com.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Beach column shows how Nancy Lanza was a victim

I was deeply moved by Randall Beach’s column regarding Marie Romano’s struggle with living with a mentally ill child. Once again Mr. Beach gets to the soul of an issue that other columnists and reporters ignore. He, through his own words and those of Mrs. Romano, brings forward the pain and helplessness of a parent seeking help for her child in our woefully inadequate mental health system.
As someone who grew up with a schizophrenic brother, I know the agony of living with the illness daily; however, my pain was surely minor compared to that of my parents, who struggled unsuccessfully year after year to find help for their son. Only luck made my brother gentle rather than violent.
It is tragic to me to find out that 50 years after my experience, with dozens of drugs, therapies, and experiments under its belt, the system is still so inadequate for Mrs. Romano and millions of others.
I have read countless articles about the Newtown tragedy, and almost none of them count Adam Lanza’s mother among the victims. Because she was killed, we can only guess what she had been through over the years.
My parents, at least, had each other for support; Mrs. Lanza had no one. I hope Mr. Beach’s column showed a few people that the mother, imperfect as all of us are, lived a good part of her adult life struggling alone with her child and his illness, with little help from a system that is broken or was never whole in the first place. I hope a few more people will begin to consider Nancy Lanza a victim along with the precious children and courageous educators that died that terrible day. Thank you, Mr Beach.
Rosemary Serfilippi
Northford

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